"To love is to discover and complete one's self in someone other than oneself."--Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
One thing will always fascinate me about babies: how fast they grow into big people! My baby is one year old today and just look at the difference. Every day he is saying something new, making a new sound with his drool and pressed-together lips, moving across the room in a new way, and exploring his world a little differently than yesterday.
When Miles was born a year ago, I went into labor at about 4 in the morning. The neighbor's dog was barking incessantly at the fence and when I awoke to grumble, I discovered I was having some crampy feelings, kind of like PMS back pain. B and I laid in bed whispering and wondering if it was real, this being 4 days before the dude's due date. Indeed, it was to be the big day, so we made our way excitedly out the door and to the midwife's house. She had to kick her poor husband out of bed to make a birthing room for us! (We love you Brenda and Mike!)
I got in the bathtub and lounged around eating popsicles and eating ice until about 9 ish when I threw up my chocolate peanut butter ice cream from the previous night and labor kicked into high gear. I remember looking at the clock at 9:22 am and then not doing a lot of conscious "thinking" until about an hour before the delivery. I went into a state that, in hindsight, reminds me of what a mother elk must feel like when giving birth: huge, bellowy, and shifting around a lot. I moaned my way through the contractions in a low and primitive way. I do remember being on all fours on the bed and feeling a pretty intense contraction when I heard a big PLOP like a giant water balloon just fell out of me and burst. The bag of water had broken. The midwife must've come in about then and been surprised because all of a sudden, I was handed some liquid chorophyll to drink and told that Miles would be with us soon!
The pushing bit was strange, I had exhausted myself getting through the contractions and didn't have much energy left. Miles crowned and hung out on my perineum for about 40 minutes. I think I finally gasped that I couldn't do it (we'd been warned by our hypnobirthing coach that we'd have a baby in minutes once this is declared) and asked Brandon to sit behind me. When the next wave came through I bore down and we sat up rather forcefully together and out the little man came! He got a quick swab with a towel from the midwife and was placed on my belly.
Touching him for the first time was one of the most mystical and satisfying things I've ever experienced. The placenta delivered less than 10 minutes later and wet, silky Miles anxiously clamoured up to nurse like a pro. (I was grateful that he knew what he was doing) We three collapsed in a heap for a few hours as if in a blissful, technicolor dream.
About our birthing experience, I can say it was a dream come true. There isn't one thing I would change about how Miles experienced his first moments in this realm. I consider myself so very, very blessed.
Happy Birthday, Miles Lighthorse, my heart's delight. We love you so much.
