Pink Coyote

SouLodge Virtual Retreat is Live!

I'm so excited to announce the details of this online class! I'm over the moon to deepen my work with myself, with my community, and to midwife you through your explorations of the parts of yourself that want to come forward with courage and wildness.

is up HERE.

I want to invite you to step into the forest, into a safe lodge where you can experience a rite of passage, an honoring of the feminine process, a place where the Four-Leggeds and Winged Ones, the Plant People, and Stone People, are waiting to greet you and help you walk through to the next level of intuitive self-care.

Thank you to all who have encouraged me to do this, for asking for the teachings, and for opening your hearts to the deeper work. I am in pure gratitude for all of you.

 

VLOG Sacred Tools: Working with Crystals

At long last, and thank you for your patience! Now that I have the kinks worked out, we can start talking e-course. Yipppeeeee! Awrooooooooooooooooooo!

 

 

The crystals featured in the video are a selenite wand, a chunk of raw rose quartz, and an amethyst formation from inside of a geode.

The Owl wing is from a Barn Owl, which I use in intuitive work because of Owl's ability to cross easily from one realm to the other, and because she brings magic and femininity to all that she touches.

I read from Sandra Ingerman's book, Medicine From the Earth.

 

Thank you all again for your love, patience, and curiosity for the Earth and her magical ways. Bless...

 

Whale Medicine

Did I mention that when I go to Squam next week, I get to room with Maya? I'm um....SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS. Er, I've had a girl crush on her for a couple of years (she and her barn) and so this is kind of like a dream come true for me. I'm taking wine and Fearless Chocolate because our cabin (which is called Shelter, by the way) is going to exude fearlessness. And because I want to impress her with my knowledge of such things.

I've been thinking a lot about my own creative offerings here lately. It's important to me that I try as hard as I can to keep my work as original as possible. It means I have to glance into a reference book when I'm making a medicine bundle, but that I slam it shut after a few minutes so that I can try to create something that is really about my experience in communication with these elements and not about what has already been written about them. It can be very tough, especially if I'm worn out and busy-headed. My creative process is something I intend to sit down to with sacredness in mind-I want to honor the time and the process and not regurgitate what the experts already know best.

Today Ivy jabbed a bobby pin in her ear about twenty minutes after I sat down, stones and herbs in hand, and so I basically threw everything into the air and ran to beat her Dad into the bathroom. This is only one of the kind of distractions I face many times per day. Every mama I know has the same story, so, no pity please.

My question is how do we keep our visions and projects really authentic?

I was working on a Whale bundle tonight and I read in Animal Speak that “Creativity for creativity's sake is not what Whale teaches. It awakens great depths of inspiration...”

Right away what struck me is that I don't do very much playing/playing around when I sit down to get creative. I like to make a mess, but I'm very focused, even when I paint. If I'm not in somewhat of a trance state, I don't feel like I'm pulling up those reserves, which are so full of ancient information and archetypal goodness. Yet, it's very easy with an ocean of distractions surrounding me to get stuck and sit here creatively constipated and stalling, while I try to get back on track.

When I'm witching it up in the kitchen, it's a whole different ballgame. I can chew up a spiky root and spit it into a glass of vodka like a Yankee pitcher- it's intensely fun and I can integrate play with it. But there is something about painting and making bundles that makes me all serious-like. I think my chin scrunches up even. I can't multitask very well during those times.

I don't have a spelled-out answer for how to keep your work truly authentic, serving your deepest human intent. I don't know if I could ever name that intuitive process that you likely have felt, too, the ones where you feel your soul infusing the piece of art, music, food, etc. These often become our "favorite" pieces, right?

Nevermind that I'm going to teach this very thing at Squam next week. How to tap the intuition, how to get to the bottom of the ocean where the Oracle Muse lives to share her stories with you so you can bring them to life. I trust that as a class, we will find our wild way together... and alone.

Whale is about going deeeeeeeeeeeeeep. I can hear her sounds bouncing off of the ocean floor as she communicates those sacred messages up. I hope you enjoy her- I felt really honored to be working with her. She is so lovingly intolerant of fear and stuckness! Flowing big and bold with the currents...

WHALE: Stepping Into Vibrant Potential

This bundle is about allowing your true colors to come forth and be expressed. It promotes vitality, longevity, and fruition of creative vision. It is about tuning into YOUR authentic offerings that are unique to YOU, and trusting that deepest voice that speaks only truth. It is about discovering the courage to share that song with the world.

Colorful Bornite is an iridescent mineral that captivates attention with it's reflective magentas and chromatic blues. Stone expert Melody says, “This mineral can bring freshness and newness to one's life. It stimulates the inner spirit to seek further heights and substantiates ones ability to enjoy happiness in the moment". It is a very positive and supportive stone which is experienced energetically as a loop that circles around transforming negativity into what she calls “pure beneficial energy”. When I read this, I immediately thought of the sonic waves whales send out, and how that mimicks the ripple effect we experience traveling outward when we're doing the work that serves our divine human intent. This stone speaks of heart and harmony, which is akin to the contract we make when we commit to our creativity and the soul-nourishment it provides. It is also known to stimulate adrenaline, which is a rush often felt when on the right path. Bornite provides energy to move towards vitality in life.

Kelp is included for it's protective qualities on the immune system and it's ancient healing properties. Kelp contains iodine, necessary to good health, but often forgotten from the diet. Kelp feeds many species of undersea and seaside communities, providing essential nutrients to the body and protection from free radicals, including those caused by nuclear radiation. When our creativity is under attack from the doing and thinking-too-much mentality so common in patriarchal societies, it is not unlike fallout. Reaching our full potential can feel impossible. Kelp is a swaying reminder, deep in the waters of the Earth's womb that growth is not only possible, it can also be all the nourishment we need.

Pansy is here to bring cheerfulness, love and beauty to the magic of this bundle. It is commonly associated with “loving thoughts”, required when embracing the potential that lies ahead. It is ever important not to turn on the Self when discouraged, and Pansy is here as a heartsease, (one of it's common botanical names), to offer comfort and protection when facing obstacles. Pansies re-seed themselves, thus they are prolific. They seldom have problems with disease and insects, which tells us that they are hardy and tolerant, despite their delicate appearances. Beautiful Pansy is used medicinally to treat afflictions of the skin, and as soon as I read this I thought about how sometimes we're “itching” to share ourselves and feel fully expressed, yet we lack the trust in our own voice to speak it out and take those risks. Pansy is also used to induce labor, which, when used as a tonic, strengthens those notions already within us.

Whale is the Mother within the Great Mother. She is a magnificent and feminine songstress of the sea, using her ultimate gift of sensitivity to sound to communicate and “sing” to, and with, her tribal pod. She does not hold back, breaching out of the water and showing her shiny skin to the Sun, rejoicing in the vibrancy of life by sharing that which she has discovered down in the deep blue. Whale does not re-enact what others are doing. She is brave in tapping her own vast intuitive resources for inspiration. Whale is a creature of great depth, reflecting that we each have the power to swim down into the unconscious for strength and life-enriching nutrients that are seasoned with what is most true for the individual. She teaches us how to TRUST our own voice and not look to others for too much direction. Whales communicate with sonar, and can perceive themselves and those around them authentically and without projection. Whale does not get caught up in that which does not serve her deepest intent. She has perfected the art of knowing what her gifts are and is unafraid to breathe them up into life for the Earth and Sky to receive.

 

Turn to the Harp

There was a time when I was all about doing it right. When I had no other tools other than thinking it through, writing it down, hashing it out, forming opinions, making a decision and going for, or against it.

Again with this turning forty business- is it just me? Or is there a whole life that exists between the lines of logic?

photo by Terri Fischer.

Outside of helping my business test it's wings, paying the DMV their dues, and occasionally checking on my children's hygeine, I find myself hanging onto reason by a neglected thread. Books with decidedly un-western tales of where the divine feminine is hiding seek me out, and it is into these realms that I sail, diving deeper than ever into the place where there is no push, and even fewer answers.

When one side of human nature grows out of balance with the other, it becomes a tyranny on the soul. That is the tyrant Duke Morgan. It drives its complimentary opposite into the unconscious. That is Blanchefleur. But the unconscious will not tolerate this kind of imbalance; we have already learned that the greatest force in the psychic universe is the demand for completion, for wholeness, for balance. The feminine will return. Across the seas, Iseult is waiting. And when Iseult comes, the self-satisfied patriarchal world will never be the same.   --WE, Robert Johnson.

I read a thread of opinions recently that brought into sharp focus how removed I'm becoming from...well, strong opinions! As odd as that may sound. I did not even know how to respond or chime in. I think I would have had plenty to say about a subject like this a few years ago, but I checked in with myself and came up with...yep, nothing.

I'm not trying to come up with nothing. I'm really not. I see myself as having been overidentified with my own inner masculine (animus) for so long, that though I'm not trying to reject this part of myself- but rather bring it into balance with my healthy feminine aspects- at this point in time I have very little use for it. Perhaps because I'm gestating a big project? Maybe. It's quite like being pregnant again and reminds me of how ambivalent I've felt, even at election times-which used to get a hot rise out of me before I had children.

When we moved to the Central Valley of California four years ago, I was full of fear. It was all my rednecked, oil-field laden, pesticided, anti-creative, dustbowl nightmares come true. But something strange has happened, as I've come to realize that where I live is more like the rest of the world than the hidden hippie mountain communities I wish I lived in. What I think I'm learning is that the world needs the kind of healing that isn't happening through politics or lobbying. What I'm learning is that I'm surrounded by people who WANT to heal and who ARE healing, despite appearances that have long left me feeling suspiciously otherwise. Perhaps this is why I don't have many opinions anymore. Basically, I've learned that I don't know shit. *Logically* know.

On another level completely, the deepest recesses of Self that we can touch inside of us, a marriage is trying to take place. The lost and knowing feminine is calling up, and she is dark, mysterious, silent, and ocean wave-like. She is transmuting poison, transforming shadows, applying the salves of the ancients, reminding us that to begin in our own injured hearts is to allow the medicine to trickle out effortlessly. It requires a kind of trust that has, in the past, made me very uncomfortable, because I am a big ole control freak. I've had trouble having faith that I'm protected from within. But I think I'm getting it now. The control freak seems to be a one dimensional warrior who misses his queen and is drenched in longing for her to rejoin him. She is Deep Trust, and she is Unwavering Faith, and she has been all but missing for the first half of my life.

No wonder I'm so eager to embrace her.

Each of us needs the sword power. There are times when we need to be logical and analytical. At times, we must be assertive and strong. But there are also times when neither logic nor force will avail; then we need to turn to the harp.  --WE, Robert Johnson.

 

photo by Stacy de la Rosa.

burning woman*

i'm too tired to capitalize, i'm sorry, friends. my beltane weekend away brought so so much teaching, movement and unexpected growth. best moments were cackling it up under the stars around a fire with some amazing women who traveled a long way to play with me and my local wild women. most surprising was coming home a day early to tend to my own homefire.

here is a photo journal of some of my favorite moments...

the day began with picking up my cohorts and going out for the absolute BEST veggie burgers and fries ever in the world at r&d, on montana ave. in santa monica. if you're in the neighborhood, do not pass them up. the food is magical. i wish i'd snapped the mascarpone and berries for you to drool over.

 

terri working her henna skillz on kirsten.

and again on julie...

 

beach shenanigans, which involved wine drinking and cheerleading jumps in the ocean.

terri, kirsten and julie.

photo by terri

altar building

talking stickin'

tarot card readin'

it was a weekend of laughter and merriment, but also one of deep emotional processing and exhaustion. it is said that beltane is all about fertility, may day, as it were. i would say we covered some pretty fertile territory, unearthed some deep roots, shifted our perspectives and learned a lot about what we have to let go. what i tried to bear in mind on this adventure was to know what i needed and ask for what i want. isn't that sometimes the hardest thing to do? to claim what's already yours-and to stand in the confidence of that decision?

i plan to go camping (or glamping as one husband had referred to it, as his wife journeyed toward) each beltane and for every natural holiday that i possibly can. i love that there is purpose in these days that mark mid-spring and solstices, that there is a history there to add to the toolkit for growing and learning. sometimes the lesson is to sit still and stop growing! and i embrace those teachings, too, as i tend to get easily obsessed with movement. however, this time movement swept me up and away without warning, and through the eye of a very small needle.

i hope that your holy day of fires on the mountain found you releasing the old and making way for the new, in one way or another, dramatically or softly.

Deep Magic

This magic has taken me to places I've never been as a healer. I wanted to call it Kicking Cancer's Ass, but decided against it. But you know from where I'm coming...

TURKEY VULTURE and COYOTE

The medicine of this bundle is about transmuting disease and balancing the body during a health crisis. It employs Turkey Vulture's willingness to work deeply in the trenches to rid the environment of disease, toxins and waste. It calls upon Coyote for vitality, adaptability and humor during the long process of treatment and healing.

It contains:

A pinch of organic tobacco, a traditional offering to the Spirits.

A pinch of cornmeal to create a sacred container for the elements to reside in.

Black tourmaline is protection from negative energy, particularly that of radiation, electromagnetism, and environmental toxins. It grounds, while increasing physical vitality. It encourages a positive attitude, no matter the circumstances and defends against disease. It strengthens the immune system, provides pain relief and stimulates creativity. I've called upon it in this application to create healthy cell growth and as a powerful protector against cancer treatments and drug side effects.

Black kyanite is tied to the top of this bundle and I was struck by it's wing shape after I was directed to ask Turkey Vulture to work this medicine. Kyanite is a spiritual mineral which connects an individual to their higher selves during a time of transition. Kyanite dispels blockages, anger, stress, fear, and encourages truthful self-expression. It heals infection and restores Qi to the physical body and organs.

Sugilite is a wise and loving stone that I like to think of as the gentle existentialist. It protects the soul from shocks, trauma, and disappointment. I brings light and love into the darkest situations. It aids forgiveness, and helps resolve group dynamics difficulties. Sugilite promotes deep understanding, alleviation of emotional turmoil and channels healing energy into the body, mind and spirit. The manganese in sugilite clears discomfort, relieves pain and purifies lymph and blood.

Yarrow is known as nature's bandaid, able to heal the deepest wounds. In this application, and according to Matthew Wood, yarrow "is suited to conditions where the mind is sometimes dim or restless,” or in some cases a bit numb from the lack of connection to what we most value about life. Yarrow will help you find your way back to singing in the garden, reconnecting with the Earth and the Plant People with the sun on your back when healing has taken place.

Nettles break down mucous in the body, cleans the organs of the first through third chakras, relieves joint pain and allows gravel and waste to pass easily through the elimination systems. Matthew Wood describes nettles as a stern Grandmother, using a whip or a broom to hustle things along, keep them moving and commanding action. For some reason I can hear her giving orders in Spanish and keeping everyone in line. Wood explains that nettles' extremely high levels of protein articulates nitrogenous waste products into proteinacious structures. They remove uric acid waste by working with complicated building blocks to build some of the most complicated molecules used by the body. Nettles are the most protein-rich green growing native in the west.

Red clover cleans the blood and detoxifies. It breaks up coagulated blood and relieves lymphatic congestion. It is known as a second chance remedy and is indicated in cancer treatments because of it's abilities to dissolve that which swells the glands, and stores excess calcium.

Vulture is purification, and an unsung hero for keeping environments clean and disease-free. Oft misunderstood, Native Americans see Turkey Vulture as one who restores harmony, limiting infection and bacteria, a tremendous force of balance for the Earth. She uses her energy wisely and gracefully, catching thermals and soaring with ease, rather than expending precious energy flapping. She is a patient matriarch, with highly developed intuition and powerful healing abilities. Her digestive tract contains chemicals that kill violent, infectious bacteria, allowing her to transcend ingested toxins and use only what is necessary to her purpose of survival. Ted Andrews writes that “Vulture is a promise that the suffering of the immediate is temporary and necessary, for a higher purpose is at work, even if not understood at the time. In my own healing journey, Turkey Vulture has always existed as an affirmation of life, and often of the rebirth that follows a major life event or trauma.

A Coyote claw is included in this bundle. Coyote is tricky, funny, and adaptable. He offers you his companionship, his celebratory howl, his wit, and teachings of life as they appear without warning. He is the wise and bumbling fool, on a new journey, sometimes learning things the hard way. What makes Coyote such a spectacular companion on what can sometimes feel like a hayride to hell, is his humor. There is magic in his ways, as he gets lost on side roads, scavenges for nourishment wherever he can find it, and amuses himself along the way. Coyotes are very close with their loved ones, snuggling in the den, and cooperatively hunting and parenting. They are nurturing, playful and spirited. Wild, free and never to be extinct, his lesson is one of endurance, longevity and a fulfilled life of meaningful song and dance. Coyote is, in many ways, invincible.

Plants and Stones

It has been a full few days. Sunday, I tinctured with Grandmother Nettles well into the night. I'm going to do a seperate post on making the mother tinctures, because it deserves it's own post. I will say that I loved being up late making magic like a kitchen witch on the night of New Moon while all lay quiet in the house.

Monday I had a little minor surgery in the morning and came home all shot out of the gate, and sat in bed with my laptop ordering supplies and returning emails. Not even the pain pills keep me down, and I say this with no pride.

I needed to replenish many stones I'd run out of, plus charms, deerskin, and of course, along the way I fell in love with some new ones. I'm making a custom bundle for someone with Stage 4 Lymphoma and this black kyanite wing appeared and tapped me on the shoulder...this thing is incredible, I can hardly put it down.

Bornite, also called peacock ore, is my new love. It is a supercharged positive mineral associated with pure joy and spinning the chakras to a blissful tune.

The wisteria is in full flower, making our arbor smell heavenly.

Miles discovered the biggest clover we've ever seen...

...and presented me with a sunny day bouquet.

I'm working heavily with the birds again, having begun three paintings tonight-the first since January! I could feel that quiet settle over me...I've missed it so much. Big birds. Hawks. Eagles. Griffin. Phoenix. Turkey Vulture. Raven. They are swooping in and removing, building, hatching, rebirthing...doing the work they're so good at.

Who's rapping at your chamber door?

Once Upon a Nettle

If you are my Facebook "friend" you may be right tired of hearing the word nettles. I have become an absolute fanatic about them, considering that they are growing wild all over our back property and in full season right now. There has been many a lively discussion about what to do with them and how to endure their prickly, welty stings in order to come to know the one known as the little Grandmother with a broom who comes in and gets to work moving things along.

Today I collected her leaves three times for three cups of tea, for the sinus infection I'm suffering. I just picked the leaves and some of the tops and stuffed them into a mug about half-way to the top, and then poured boiling water over them. I picked them fresh each time to make sure that the life and energy of the plant was at it's peak. The first cup was very clearing and satisfying, and I used a neti pot afterward with great success. I chomped her wilty leaves from the bottom of my cup. The sting leaves the plant after about 3 minutes after being picked when the acid in the needles loses it's mojo.

Nettles contain more protein than any other native green, her claim to fame being breaking down uric acid lickity split, having a curative effect on kidney conditions, mucus in the intestines, and gout. She attacks mucus like a crimefighting ninja superhero and I've had better luck with her than with any other herb. She loves to grow around junk heaps, where the soil is unfavorable, making gold out of the worst conditions. I consider her an alchemist. The possibilities of her use are endless. Matthew Wood tells a story of a man with no feeling in his legs flogging them with nettles and regaining feeling, allowing him to walk again. Isn't that wild?

When I harvested tonite, under the starlit sky, I was alone and in no hurry, so I took my time talking to her, listening, I sang her a native song, peed nearby as an offering, and thanked her, promising to bury some crystals and medicine near her roots with the children tomorrow.

I love how the kids are learning to respect her, though her sinister needles have impaled them mercilessly. They seem to be appreciative of the gifts that plants give us, and Miles has noticed that she springs up for free, with no effort at all, every Spring. As he prepares to plant his vegetable garden, I see him lingering near the wild dandelions, lying in the flowering clover, inspecting the weeds. I wonder if he is curious about cultivated plants versus wild ones. I hope he asks me why they're both important. I think he'll figure it out on his own...

Springtime Goodness

There are still a few spots open in my Friday Muse as Mask class at Squam AND the Medicine Shawl class. Jump on board and return from the northeast forever inspired.

Loving this Cherry Blossom Essence offering from my friend MaryBeth and Three Sister's Alchemy. It's the perfect, Keep Me Present and Grateful in This Moment elixir. Thank you, Goddesses, for your magic and your positive energies.

Absolutely flipping over the relaxing power of chocolate. Yes, I did say relaxing. Lisa Reinhardt, of Wei of Chocolate, sent me a tube of passionflower and bird of paradise-infused organic RELAXED chocolate and the kids and I are HOOKED. I'm also over the moon about JOYFUL. Thank you, Lisa, for your generosity and for creating chocolate that heals, when I seriously thought chocolate couldn't get any better.

When women honor their ability to make magic, my heart soars. It seems Springtime is bursting open all around with mystical, intuitive healers popping up like fresh daisies.

 

Hummingbird

I have been inundated with custom work since opening myself up to doing it. It takes so much time, but oh my goddess...it's so fulfilling. Each one is a crash course in doing a reading for someone, and making relationships between allied plants, stones, animals and energies to create a little healing companion, basically-one who manifests movement and change, in addition to acting as salve on the wounds that prevent us from going forward.

I want to share this one with you, because it really has opened my heart.

HUMMINGBIRD

*The medicine of this bundle is about the patient healing of the heart, releasing negative energy, and the art of gentle and focused movement. It teaches how to appreciate the beauty in every moment.


It contains:

A pinch of organic tobacco, a traditional offering to the Spirits.

A chunk of sweetgrass is for purification of negative opinions, sweet positive vibrations, a pleasant relationship with the Self, and as a prayer for healing. Sweetgrass serves as a reminder of the eternal and spiritual beauty within us all.

St. Johns Wort is for chronic conditions of pain, nervous exhaustion, emotional depression, stress, anxiety and fear. In cases of nerve trauma and myalgias, it calms the cycle that creates persistent dis-ease.

Milk Thistle is primal and detoxifying nourishment. It self-seeds with it's light, fluffy seedheads, spreading healing everywhere it goes. Milk thistle is a medicinal food. It breaks down bile, decongests the liver, and clears out obstructions. It is used for melancholy and despondency, targeting emotions of the spleen, which is commonly associated with anger and frustration. It lingers in the 3^rd chakra, or power center to help with eliminative functions and processing of toxins. It is a herb which is indicated in serious cases where a patient is seriously ill or facing death. It's claim to fame is curing various types of poisonings.

Raw emerald is for infinite patience and protection. The Crystal Bible says that emerald is the stone of successful love, that it is life-affirming, keeps a partnership in balance, and brings about domestic bliss and loyalty. This could mean with a literal partner or within. It opens the heart chakra, calms the emotions, eliminates negativity, enhances psychic abilities, and opens us to clairvoyance. It is a protective stone which strengthens the character to overcome the misfortunes of life. It is helpful in cases of claustrophobia and enhances the ability to live life to the fullest.

Hummingbird has flown into this bundle to demonstrate his brilliant technique of hovering above a situation to observe the beauty of it. He drinks the nectar of life from every possible flower, never missing an opportunity to experience the sweet beauty of his world. His flight, though rapid in wing movement, is gentle and fairy-like, bringing magic to the bird kingdom with his uniqueness. He comes to remind us in times of hardship that we can always see beauty, we just have to look a bit harder than when we are literally surrounded by it at all times. His movement is energized, focused, and calculated. He promises to be with us when it is most difficult to appreciate the NOW. While forward movement is guaranteed, Hummingbird specializes in the beauty of the present moment.

 

 

Smudging the New Den

photo by fellow Traveler, Lisa Field-Elliot

It's very exciting to me that so many of you are asking for more details about smudging and creating sacred space in your environments. If you didn't see the first video, which covered a little bit of information on smudging, check it out here.There are also a few resources for smudge sticks listed in that post.

One question is whether one should smudge her apartment before she moves her things in or after. If it were me, I would like to smudge the empty nest first. I take my shell or bowl, light the smudge stick (I'd definitely use white sage in a new dwelling) until it's burning nicely, then blow out the flame so that the dried herbs are smoking. You can use your hand or a big feather to fan the smoke up into all of the corners of each room, and into the cabinets and closets.

Here are some awfully pretty fans that I found on Etsy by searching for "smudge fan". The legal-use feathers used are painted to resemble eagles and hawks and look nice and big. I also like the looks of these. You could just as easily make your own. Wonderful feathers are sold at pow wows, as well as Etsy, or you may have a local farm that will allow you to collect.

Aside: Be forewarned, if you are planning to purchase a fan from this seller, that she is indeed selling real migratory and predator bird feather fans from Australia, and U.S. Migratory Bird Laws do not allow the sale or purchase of feathers from protected species (almost all birds except some fowl, I believe). Fines for buying, selling or even carrying a migratory bird feather are in the thousands of dollars. Risky business. I don't mean to be a boo-bird while up there flaunting my Hawk wing.

What smudging does is clears the existing energy out, especially in corners and small spaces in which it tends to gather and stagnate. Smudging also acts as a prayer of blessing and intention in a new space where you hope to thrive.

The photo above was snapped by a friend I visited this weekend. After we'd done a fair bit of unloading of our hearts and before we headed out to breakfast and back to our families, we smudged ourselves and her altar. I think of it like a reset button. I joke to friends sometimes that if I get pulled into negative energies online that I have to smudge my computer screen. I actually do it, believe it or not. I can feel negative energy sticking on me like stinky perfume!

Good luck smudging, goddesses. I hope you'll enjoy it as much as I do.

 

 

 

Vlog Sacred Tools: Medicine Pouch

Here's another informal backyard vlog on using sacred medicine tools. This time I take you on a quick tour through stuffing my pouch to get ready for an overnight trip. Can you tell I'm in a bit of a hurry to get packed and on the road? I still haven't sorted out how to set up the camera for the best view and so I'll try to work the kinks out there before I make the next one.

I also share a bit of the drum for a teaser of what the trance beat is like when one takes a traditional shamanic journey, as promised. The drum sounds a bit flat on the video, but it actually has a nice deep resonance. If you feel called to find a drum for yourself, be sure to play lots of them. There will be a sound and size that feels just perfect for you.

To learn more about shamanic journeywork, try Michael Harner's Way of the Shaman or Sandra Ingerman's Soul Retrieval. Both detail the purpose of taking shamanic journeys, as well as how they are conducted in a sacred manner. If you'll be attending Call of the Wild, my mixed-media workshop at Squam Art Workshops in September, you'll get a little taste of what the journey is like for yourself.

To learn more about animal totems and begin the path toward integrating the wild creatures into your spirit practice, check out Ted Andrews' Animal Speak or Animal Wise. There are a lot of great card decks that explore animal symbolism, as well, and a quick search at Amazon or your local metaphysical shop will produce colorful options for divining animal wisdom. If you have a great resource for animals, please share it in the comments. Sometimes I find old books at the library on a particular species and that gives a nice depth. We can learn so much from creatures just by observing them, as many of you already do.

I don't think you could see the beautiful purple earrings I'm wearing, but I'm wild about them. They were crafted by Celisa Nalls of MySoulCanDance and when I opened the package, I could feel joy leaping out at me. The adornments we wear, or talismans we're drawn to help tap us into our intuitive nature, too. The creations we make with our hands vibrate with the energy that we bring to the worktable, and that creates a ripple of light that never ends. It's such a blessing to have access to so many gifted and inspirited artisans.

The sacred Lakota corn was given to me by Lauren Luquin of Visionwise. One of the best things about meeting others on this path is that we get to share tools and honor one another with gifts to add to the ever-expanding toolkit for healing ourselves and the Earth.

On my travels to the coast this weekend, I might leave behind any one of the items in my pouch as an offering to the earth. It is traditional practice to leave tobacco as an offering or a tiny crystal, such as the amethyst one I tucked in there. The lavender buds or the corn would also be a nice way to thank the Earth and Spirit for the gifts and healing they bring.

Please consider the comments section a forum for questions and sharing of stories. We all benefit from hearing others sing with their authentic voices.

Thank you for honoring the medicine and howling up this beautiful Wolf Moon we're seeing!

Coil Up and Rebirth

Snake Medicine Bundle. Ssssss.

I find myself repeating this thought: I'm learning what I teach. There will be, in my opinion, no time in the future where any one of us has all the answers. I can't remember if I've every fantasized about "arriving" to that seat of wisdom one stooped over, white-haired day, but I probably have at some point.

What I have learned... is that there is always more to learn.

Snake is good medicine for learning all you can in one mode and then shedding the pile-up and beginning again, even if in just a slightly new way. It's humbling, this one, one of being bitten and poisoned by the stacking up of thinking gone too far, of insulation. Snake asks us to let it all go, like a robe at our feet and step out afresh. A friend to change, she holds the bar high for courageous releasing.

 

Nor a Cage

 

Hawk has been one of my favorite allies to work with since I started studying shamanism almost a decade ago. They're quite common to spot, it seems everyone has some kind of relationship with this mighty bird. What peeved me so much in the beginning about this solar king is that his messages seem to elude me by asking me to be responsible! How dare he! Each time one would whiz across my patio, hunt my pasture, or perch above the road as I drove by, I would curse it, because I knew that whatever I was toiling with in that moment would only be resolved by going inward for the difficult answer, and not the easy one on the surface.

Hawk has shown up in several of my paintings because I'm constantly turning over the notion of honing the intution. It's become a mantra of mine, and I reckon it's due to the fact that I have become more trusting of my own inner guidance. When he comes around, waving his giant wingspan at me, I know that I'll soon be asked to make a decision or seek clarity about a matter.

Angelica is the herb inside of the bundle above, nesting along a boulder of beautiful blue sodalite. Both of them felt so good in my hands. Angelica smells earthy and a bit like licorice root. Her message was for the seer, in favor of the intuition, of dreamtime. She is akin to St. Michael and I've always made a connection between Hawk and St. Michael, and now I have something to go on.

Have you ever had an issue and had to "sleep on it"? My friend and I were just speaking about our tendencies to allow some of our issues to resolve in the dreamtime. He and I both agreed that some things have to come from so deep within, that we cannot even be awake lest we intervene with the process. There is a sweet freedom that comes with letting the inner wisdom do the work. As I keep hearing myself say aloud, I trust this process.

I so enjoy exploring my relationships with the creatures, and as I make new friends with the Stone People and Plant People, I welcome you to come along and share and learn, too. Mama Earth is so rich with teachings, I feel blessed to live on this beautiful planet with all of them and you, too.

 

I will not be clapped in a hood,

Nor a cage, nor alight upon wrist,

Now I have learnt to be proud

Hovering over the wood

In the broken mist

Or tumbling cloud.

 

-from The Hawk by William Butler Yeats

 

Video: Sacred Tools

I present to thee, sweet goddesses, an informal video introducing a few sacred tools that I use in my practice, including the medicine bundles which are making their ways out into the world. It's a simple demonstration of smudging and a few words about the intuitive process. Enjoy!

 

Self-consciousness is not allowed here at the Jack White School of Vlogging for Coyotes, despite my urge to critique. However, did you catch a quick glimpse of the very cute, cosmic batik-printed, perfect, dread wrap I was donning? I hear tell that Julie Bartel is making some new ones, so perhaps I'll have a link to her shop soon.

Back to sacred business!

In this video, you saw:

White Sage and Cedar Bundles made by Sarah Jane Owen, of PowWowLodge

A sweetgrass braid by Juniper Ridge

Organic Tobacco by Natural American Spirit, though I want to add that dried lavender or other herb you love can be used in it's place.

 

I loved sharing this part of my world with you and have so much gratitude that we get to meet here to stretch and grow together.

 

 

The Splits

Several times in my life I've felt as if a part of me was missing. The first time I recall it was twenty years ago, after the devastating loss of a mate, which triggered all sorts of abandonment injuries, or perhaps reinjuries, to my soul. I felt like the walking dead for many months and I can look back and see how it affected me for years.

Loss comes with regularity now, and each time it happens I can feel how something I no longer need strips away off of me and falls back to the Earth. It drifts lightly down, like a snakeskin. The letting go can be an exhilarating experience when the lessons become clear. When my Grandfather passed last year, it marked the beginning of shedding major layers of stories that had been paining my family for generations. Since I am the keeper of ceremony for my family, I processed those events for us, releasing the pain in solitary rites and gifting them to the Earth for transformation, like a fall dandelion releasing its featherlight seeds to be reborn.

I went to a circle on Friday night, my first with my treasured women since May. Our teacher had moved to the city and is now making her way back home. In an exercise with a partner, in which we stood face to face, then back to back, receiving readings and messages, I felt very open and vulnerable. I could feel the void within me. I felt like I'd been seperated from my twin and in this moment, I was reunited as a tree from which roots shot down into the deep Earth and arms extended to the Sky and grew taller, taller, until I could look down over all of the grove and feel my evergrowing commitment to this work.

I have to say that I left with a lingering feeling that my soul is in a bit of disrepair, and seeking a part of herself that got split off, as if scanning the rubble for the missing bit. I intend to ask for a soul retrieval from someone qualified, to bring in some insights, or I may conduct one by myself. My dreams and experiences this new year all seem to point in the direction of bringing a cleansed aspect back in that somehow got lost in all of that shedding. Since the exercise (that felt more like a healing) I already feel less exposed and more protected, but in a very soft, not-armored way. That thing that was depleting me feels less internally demanding, as well.

I'm enjoying the soft gust of information that comes from sitting in a sacred space, holding the questions and awaiting the download. As I deepen my trust of this process, and hold fast to my intention to allow my body and Spirit to lead the way, my mind is getting a much needed break. It feels a bit floaty-dreamy up here, but I'm in no rush to get back to the ground yet. Maybe when my Mercury goes retrograde on Tuesday. *wink*

Medicine Lodge

Sioux Lodge

Saturday night I drove two and a half hours to Pasadena to attend my first lodge in a long time. It was a rainy torrent on the road, but I arrived just on time- to a roomful of strangers, all seeking a polishing of their spirits for the Solstice.

It was a powerful sweat, and a hot one, too. Especially that fourth round. The water-pourer kept that round short, but I could feel the water and all that I was letting go raining off of me in streams at that point, like tributaries flowing generously and sacrificially into the Great Mother.

Let me back up a bit and tell you about what I was really there for.

Midwinter is a traditional time for purification. It symbolizes a housecleaning and detoxification to prepare for the longer, deeper days of winter ahead. Though we celebrate the sun's return, it will be much colder before it gets warmer, in this hemisphere, anyway.

I consider that so many of us are Lightbringers. It is as if we have awoken to our collective purpose of giving away the best of ourselves so that others and the Earth will benefit. Thus, ceremoniously welcoming the Sun back to his seasonal throne, feels affirming to me. It feels a fitting celebration for the creative work ahead.

I went to release grief. Grief of the things which cannot be and that no longer are. Grief that clings and punishes when it has stayed on beyond its healing usefulness.

I was there to release fear, always fear. Because as soon as I think I'm the bravest mama in the world, something new creeps up and scares the holy beejeesus out of me and I have to learn to release that one.

I went to meet up with ego voices and the higher selves of those I share conflict with, to sit with them at the confrontation table of trance and heat, and to listen, and receive an understanding between us, and from higher Selves and guides, about how to proceed.

I went for messages from my ancestors about the things I have no control over- time-related grievances that can only be understood and accepted outside of the castle of time, in the deep and magical forest of trust and *always*.

I've carried many heavy burdens this year, as a year tends to pile up on a being, and this time of Peace on Earth is the perfect occasion to lighten the load and cultivate peace within. I felt called to sit in the lodge as the rain pelted the exterior, chanting and prayer-speaking in unison with fourteen others.

And I went to crawl out.

Exiting a sweat lodge feels like being born. Imagine the energy and heat that accumulates as we are making our way into this world. A Midwinter sweat, with it's focused intention and collective vision charges a lodge likewise. So as anticipated, I crawled out in the end, soaking wet and mostly naked, stopping to bless the Earth and my relations with my forehead to the wet ground, and stepped out into the darkness and cold winter rain outside the flap.

I went to brighten my soul up, release the funk, and ready my skin for the new year. My voice felt and sounded extra clear as I chatted and ate like a horse at the feast afterwards in the kitchen of the Firekeeper, who'd asked me to create a heartbeat while inside with one of his drums, at the instruction of the water-pourer. A huge honor.

A very young first time sweater spoke at the closing circle, saying that when he came in to get dressed, he'd studied himself in the mirror and noticed that something had transformed. His eyes were more...sparkly. He felt alive in a really different kind of way. It's no wonder the ancestors created so many roads to rise up and meet the Spirit. And it's not a bit surprising that so many of us are finding our ways back to them.

Wishing Well

 

Well of Grief

Those who will not slip beneath
the still surface on the well of grief
turning downward through its black water
to the place we cannot breathe
will never know the source
from which we drink
the secret water, cold and clear,
nor find in the darkness glimmering
the small round coins
thrown by those who wished for
something else.

-David Whyte

 

I'm not hanging out with the Swamp Hag again, but this poem reminds me so much of my time with her. Today seemed like a good day to honor her riches, the very last day of the month of November, a month which seems to be gold like the treasure found in her haggy presence.

Have you ever read this book, by the way? I love it so. Starhawk was the very first author I read when I put my feet on this road out loud (The Spiral Dance), and she holds a special Grandmotherly place in my heart.

Reverence comes in and settles down for a comfortable nap inside of my bones these days. When I begin to paint animals, they all want to be white. They all speak to me of connection, family, stillness, divine mediocrity, the quiet quest. It reminds me of what it must be like to be a bear, cuddled up in a cave while awaking now and again to appreciate the snowy landscape outside before circling and falling again into dreamtime.

It's a beautiful time to count blessings and share love, unlike any other. I get very swept up in the giving spirit of this holiday. Each time we read a book featuring a likeness of Santa, I feel choked up. There really is a magic about giving and taking care of others warmly during the cold season. I'm still crying as often as my eyes will leak, keeping the seeds damp underground as they rest.

I've taken to sleeping with two Coyotes, a Silver Fox and the Black Wolf, the latter being a gift I will share about here soon. Sleeping under a pile of dogs has taken me to some lovely country in the dreamtime, again: white with snow and dormancy to rest in and sift through during the silent hours.

Winter is becoming like a religion to me. Come January, it will be much harder to show up joyfully for worship-but for now, I am pleased here in the desert, a soft, thick blanket of downy flakes on my mind.

Swamp Hag Days + New Work

Trooper, 2010. Mixed-media on 6x6 birch board.

OH, people. These are strange times indeed. I am in a funkity funk like no other funk, and the voices would have me believe that it is going to be this way forever. I am marching as forward as I can, dragging my paws as little as possible, but this is a tough one. It's got me hanging upside down for certain.

The show was really fun-I got to see art and also friends I haven't seen in nearly a year. I love the idea of actually going to the shows where my art appears because it's such a ceremony and celebration for the energy that goes into preparing the work. It's really one of my favorite things about this job.

I've been painting my way through, because this is one of them that there are no words for. I needed strong partners and look who showed up? My old friends, and constant companions, Owl and Coyote.

I wish I had some poetry for this one, but it hasn't come yet...the dark side of the moon always comes around again, and I feel safe here, but I need serious grounding. My feet have been up in the air for far too long. 

Tell me your stories about what you do when the swamp hag comes knocking. It's our shared stories that save us, isn't it?

Warrior, 2010. Mixed-media acrylic on 6x6 birch board.

Fed By My Feet

I've always wondered why I love to go so much. My parents tease me about loving to "go, go, go", as if I am a freakish gypsy or hobo that must move to feel sustained. I do believe that wanderlust is out of the ordinary around here, out of fashion since the dust bowl days and deluxe coupes.

I crave adventure. I want to live in other places. I want to live out of the country with my family, to speak another language poorly. I want to eat learn to love the food that other cultures eat. I want to do things that frighten me a bit. I like to push the edge of my comfort level because I thrive on learning new perspectives and all about the world's people. And creatures!

And also, because I am wild. Not so buried inside of us many, there is a brujita living in a hut which runs around on chicken legs. I don't know where she came from. Up from the generational pipeline, I suppose, having gone dormant in some women before me, and for plenty of fine reasoning. I'm glad she's with me, and that I can hear her.

I read recently that, "The wolf is kept fed by his feet". To wit, a wild woman's soul is kept fed by answering the call when one feels restless.

Up, now.

Out the cage door we must go.

Vasilisa the Beautiful

Imagine my delight when I opened up the beautiful gift sent to my daughter for her birthday by her Aunt Stevie (who hand-felted the doll):

Vasilisa is the story of a young girl whose good mother dies, and her father remarries a wicked stepmother with two horrible daughters who treat Vasilisa like a slave. Sound familiar?

As Vasilisa endures their torment and receives no protection from her weak, naive father, she keeps the doll her mother gave her tucked inside her apron.  The new regime of commanding voices which berate her, and keep her enslaved, are never ending and Vasilisa is not yet experienced enough to stand up to them.

She is sent on an impossible mission for fire one night, deep into the wilderness, to scary Baba Yaga's house. Vasilisa consults with the doll to find her way there and is comforted by it's presence in her apron. When she finally reaches the hags hut, Baba Yaga barks a list of unreasonable chores at her, planning to eat her when she fails. But the doll provides the magic help, and day after day, she guides Vasilisa and helps her meet Baba Yaga's requirements and is eventually given what she has come for.

The maid survived her dangerous journey, and that which tormented her was burned away in the fire she returned with, thanks to the blessing given to her as a birthright. Her inner knowing and guidance, symbolized by the doll, sends her the message again and again that "The morning is brighter than the evening". She alchemically transforms her own destiny by trusting and following her inner voice.

Being a woman is to go on a long journey, up and over frightful mountains and through dark valleys, listening to harsh voices that we eventually discover do not serve us- and hopefully arriving triumphantly at the place where our intuition speaks louder and more clearly, and our hearts take direction eagerly.

Today I am so grateful for the strong women and new life that surrounds me: for You, who are triumphant as you listen evermore closely to your own guiding voices. You, who enjoy knowing, more than pleasing others.

I am comforted to run into you now and again on the mossy and sometimes shaded foot trails of this path!

Tools: Plant Kingdom, Part Two

The doors are flying off of the hinges here at Pandora's box, as I realize how very many things I have in my toolkit to be shared. I don't know what's got into me! I had a completely different post planned for today, but, no. These members of my family demand to be introduced. Who am I to argue?

*Please bear in mind that my experience of plants and herbs may be somewhat different from yours. That is to say that what I feel safe ingesting may not translate to others' constitutions. Always consult reliable resources for contraindications before using, especially if pregnant, nursing, or when considering remedies for children. I'll include the references I use most at the bottom of this post, as well.

If you share a comment or story, I would love to send you a little medicine bundle of gratitude. Email me with the address you want a little plant lovin' sent to and then watch your mailbox...

 

Juniper is a common shrub which offers so many uses, from medicinal salves to headache remedies and even to prevent nightmares. I use the beautiful, tasty, little juniper berries in a tea (when I'm not pregnant or nursing) to create a sacred environment within before sitting in a sweat lodge or doing a releasing ceremony. Juniper berries (relaxing in a bowl of last year's lavender buds) are such good friends to me. I have been using them in medicine bundles as a way to dispel negative energies for a long time and there's something that is just so comforting about them. I love to throw a handful of them into a fire and smell their evergreeny scent. Carried in a pouch, they have a protective, safe quality to them. One might use them mixed with a bit of lavender or chamomile buds in a little bundle for a young child's pocket when leaving to school for the first time.

Juniper was a name I was quite keen on for Ivy, but Ivy sounded better with her middle name :) Miles loves to play with the dried berries, smell them and make special "potions" with them. Wild animals love to eat them, too.

Salvia Mellifera, or Black Sage, grows like pure madness here. I planted a very small twig I bought at a native plant sale two years ago and now this hulk is over 3' tall and perhaps 5-6' wide. Dried, then wrapped into smudge sticks with colorful cotton thread, it is a lovely companion for shamanic journeywork. Truth be told, it is a bit stinky to my nose until it is burned. Hummingbirds and bees love this giant plant, but most insects do not. That makes it perfect for burning around a campsite or picnic area to keep pesties away. The bees who frequent these plants make very yummy honey. However, I am not a beekeeper...but I know a few of you who visit here would like to be! My garden always looks lush with this evergreen fellow hanging around in bulk.

Comfrey is pretty much a lifesaver and is used routinely at our house. I first discovered it when my midwife recommended making large batches of tea out of it, refrigerating it, then spritzing my birth-weary parts after bringing Miles & Ivy in. The reason for this is that it has regenerative properties and helps tears and lacerations mend. I found it to be very useful with both births; I applied the tea directly on my birthing region extraordinaire, and also poured it liberally into the bath. I also found that it works well on Ivy's eczema if I make a tea and just lightly blot the area.

I only use it topically, because it is indicated as causing distress to the liver. The varieties used in herbal teas you may have seen on market shelves likely do not contain the harmful alkaloids that cause liver trouble. Always best to check. Some who are even more woo-woo than me might use a pendulum over the herb to intuit whether it *feels* safe to ingest or not. I like to play it safe. And I'm pretty woo-woo.

Mugwort! Doesn't that just sound like a witch's plant? It is sometimes actually referred to as Croneswort because it's an old folk belief that it springs up at the doorsteps of healers. This is a plant that I have never taken internally. I picked it up years ago while making a dream bundle for a family member who was having a terrible time sleeping and also trying to work through some issues that her thinking brain was making no progress with. It is used to stimulate lucid dreaming, but best used in small amounts so as not to have restless sleep. I'm a big fan of letting dreams do my inner work for me at times when I feel too overwhelmed to think about them in my waking life. Mugwort is another great insect repellent. Wing of bat! Eye of newt! Hair of Toad!

Balsam tea is relatively new to my collection of helpers, though I'd been drinking it without knowing it's true medicinal properties for years. I used it with great success when very little else was working on the bout with bronchitis I recently had. It's full of vitamin C, and acts as an expectorant. However it is also slightly diuretic, so I drank only one cup per day, followed by lots of water, so as not to disrupt my milk supply for Miss Ivy. It is so very yummy. Juniper Ridge makes a great bag of Douglas Fir Tip tea that I crave during the wintertime.

I hope you've enjoyed this little show-and-tell I've presented. Perhaps on your walkabouts, you'll be inspired to say hello to those plant people who rise up to greet you and make your landscape more beautiful. Maybe one in particular would like to make a love connection with you. (push play: romantic music)

Resources for Herbs:

Las Pilitas Nursery -for the best in California native plants

Cal Flora -the go-to plant identification database

Juniper Ridge- my very favorite grassroots wildcrafters who make amazing incense and tea

Mountain Rose Herbs -my one stop for organic essential oils and bulk herbs

Plants of Power: Native American Ceremony and the Use of Sacred Plants

Hygieia: A Woman's Herbal -this is radical book written by the ballsy Jeannine Parvati and I love reading her folkloric writings about woman's body and the plants that heal them. (It must be undergoing another printing according to availability)

Native American Healing Arts -a lovely reference for native ceremonies involving plants and folk medicine.

Plant Spirit Medicine -a wonderful little book about understanding the more esoteric value of plants and developing relationships to them.

I would love to hear your stories about how you heal with herbs or recollections from your childhood about a sensory experience with plants or whatever you feel moved to share. Don't be shy! Let your earthy,hooey-dooey, intuitive freak flag fly...in all of us, there is a healer.

Tools: Plants, Part One

Oh, where to begin!? While I'm not being pushy with myself to be productive, I thought I'd share some of the tools I commonly use here at home and in ritual space. There are so many tools to talk about and I simply don't know where to begin. Plants may be a good place to start.

Anything can be a useful tool for healing, change, or manifesting, when you think about it. A tool can be tangible or not. It can be a mantra or a meditation. It can take any shape, and I suppose, for me, it can be defined as a tool if it helps. (do caramels qualify? i think so.)

Here are two of my favorites from the plant kingdom, but I will be sharing lots more:

 

White sage (Salvia apiana) is found not far from here and is probably the most common herb used for smudging today. I light it over a big abalone shell , blow out the flame after a few moments, and use a feather fan to send the smoke up into the corners of a room or even inside of cabinets to break up stagnant energy and wake the place up. It's also used to purify, cleanse and prepare the body when sitting in ritual, so it isn't uncommon to be "saged" before crawling into a sweat lodge or sitting in a sacred ceremony. I love the smell of white sage and always have lots on hand.

Cedar bundles are used very much in the same way as sage, but the scent is much different, less strong. White sage is very distinctive and cedar is probably more accessible. Native Americans use it to help release heavy emotional energies, and cedar is burned in lodges to help with detoxification and purification. It is a lovely winter plant to use during  Solstice and Yule rituals.

I realize I have so many herbs, plants and roots that I use, that I could write forever about them. I'm so grateful for the plant people! They make such wonderful companions. I've entitled this "Part One" because I'll be paying my helpers a proper tribute here shortly. (They like to be photographed in sunshine and we don't have any today!)

What are some of your favorite plants and healing herbs?